• Jane Kelhod

How to go from Heart-Struck to Heart-Strong

Updated: Sep 24









1. Move From Unstable to stable


STABLE VS.


A stable foundation allows you to build, to create, to design and dream. 


A stable foundation allows you to be safe, to rest and renew regardless of what storms; of what fears, failures, rejections, or hardships the outside world throws at you.


Imagine what you can accomplish when you hold a safe, strong, stable inner and outer world, when you hold a stable foundation.




VS. UNSTABLE


But what happens when you hold a shattered foundation?


Abuse and violence destroy foundations. They destabilize and steal away all of your potential and shatter your internal and external world into chaos.


Then, with your foundation broken and in a heap, others build their dreams on top of you. They choose your life for you and trap you underneath their decisions. They wall you off from the east and the west.





2. Move From being On your own to being with a support team


If you do feel ruble under your feet, feel cold walls wrapped around you, we promise: there is still hope. We promise anything broken can be put back together again.


All you need is some help.


See, to restore a foundation, you need a team and resources, and that's where we come in.


We provide the helping hands to pull you out of the rumble; and supply the forces needed to restore your safety, your dignity, your potential, and your  freedom.





3. Move From "this just affects me (and I feel deserve it)" to "this affects all of us (even the ones I know are innocent)"


First and foremost, no matter what your internal narrative is telling you - every human being (including you) deserves freedom; deserves safety and peace; deserves stability; deserves a firm foundation.


And even though it seems like this abuse affects only you, no one lives in a vacuum. All of us are connected to each other in more ways than we can count. So, the abuse that affects you really does spill out, ripple out, cascade out into the world.





From heart-struck to heart-strong


Yes, these destabilizing forces - abuse and violence - form an axis of evil; and threaten every person, home, community, state, and nation. They threaten to create a total rolling landscape of ruble, of shattered homes and broken dreams.


But - together, we can win.


Together, we will survive, rebuild, and regain ground, stable ground, ground cultivated and rich where our potential and our freedom will reach down to bedrock and then build up and up and up. 


Together, we can build new foundations.


Together, we can grow from heart-struck to heart-strong.



- If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, call Defy Domestic Abuse's 24-hour helpline: 608-365-1119.


- If you or someone else is in danger, call 911.


- Follow Defy Domestic Abuse Beloit on Facebook and Instagram.


- Visit:

familyservices1.org/Defy



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